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Summary: This is about a boy who knows what he wants from a young age and just needs to be in diapers. I am dedicating this first chapter of my story to Deeker. I really appreciate the content on your site.
Accidents for Life
My feeling has always been to kind of hold it, but it feels even better when I feel the heat of my pee against my body and my underwear (or a diaper). What is it? I just do not know what else could cause this impulse except for that simple reason, I continued to pee my pants especially when no one was looking. I liked pooing my pants, too. This started at about 5 when I used to apparently get mad when my mom made me go and sit on the toilet. Because I was a child with intent, I would let it out on the way to the bathroom or pee a bit sitting on the toilet but remember saving some or just hold my poo and about a few minutes after I was back doing whatever I was doing, I would just squat down and let it go... then I would sit in it and feel my crotch to feel the warm pee wetness and the squishy warmth pushing up the back of my bum...... I even kind of liked the smell (as long as it was mellow). I would get my mom so mad when this series of events happened. I was always taken upstairs and she would help strip me and if it was bad make me lie on a towel or my little brother's diaper change mat in the bathroom and wipe me clean. Sometimes it was underwear but more likely trainers and plastic pants....even though I really, really wanted diapers.
So, when my brother, who was 4 years younger than I was, would pee or poo his diapers and I would see this, which I did often, I was always inclined to go out and pee my pants or poop in them right then...and often I did...I was 6 when he was 2 and 7 when he was 3 and 8 still having "peeing and pooing accidents" because, on a daily basis I would see my lucky brother relieving himself in his diapers. I sometimes just thought of him squatting and would feel like squatting too and I would...at the mall or on the way home from school or whenever.
I was questioned about intention by Dad sometimes who was the one who kept training pants in my life. I guess he just felt that it would go on and on and either through choice or accident he wanted the best way to deal with messes and keep me feeling that I would grow out of this at some point. I know that he felt it was often my choice because he did catch me playing in my room and he came in just when I was squatted down and pushing to have a big poo in my pants...
You know how any guy, me included, covers his penis with his hand and softly makes it down between their legs towards the toilet as you sit? This is a natural response to sitting down for a poo or just sitting down to pee, and if you ever see this action when a guy is kind of half bent over but he has all his clothes on, then what you are witnessing, you know instinctively, is that they are pooping or peeing in their clothes.....(I've seen this!) And that's how my Dad caught me more or less....one time, he silently came in the room to innocently watch his kid playing and I did not notice him and I bent down and pooped and really pushed..... he really surprised me by clearing his throat and I looked around just as I was finishing filling my pants. He just shook his head and said, "you will have to wait until your mother comes home to get changed." She was out and not back until just before lunch and it was 10:00 in the morning. I just stayed in my poopy mess watching TV and even added a couple of pees to it until my Mom came home. She came in and that was the first time, at 8 years old, she just got mad and put me in 3 thick diapers and rubber pants with only a t-shirt. My little brother laughed. I was just told to forget the bathroom that day and so effectively I was positively reinmaked to continually have accidents. I loved that the bathroom was out of bounds that day . I felt free, this was a natural thing to do and so expanded my peeing to the bedroom front to show my ineffective bladder control at night shortly after that....mattresses are expensive, and since I had a newly decorated boys bedroom with a new bed, was quickly put into Pampers size 6 on pretty much a permanent basis. I liked cotton and rubber pants the best but when I pooped it seemed like more work and washing.
This went on for some time and even into University where I met my man who is also a bedwetter who knows my whole story ...which is that I am truly unconscious to accidents and really feel weird without a diaper on now...I can change my diaper at my gym or while shopping downtown or at a special formal event...and love it in the morning, when my partner reaches over to pat my plastic pants bum and say " hey stinky " go change your poopy bum and call me into the shower when you are finished" he smiles and turns over to go to sleep...l reach over and feel his diapers which are only wet...when I am sick with a cold he will change me...I love this..... and there are often times when I try to help him by convincing him to just let it go in his trainers which is what I keep him in most days!
Well the story goes on but not tonight....
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