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It was the silent night that lurked outside, as Joseph was comfortable in his room watching pornography, that saw the childishness in his irresponsible behavior. It was 2:00 AM and a long day was nearing. The sun brought new opportunities for a late Spring/Summer job that he needed to pay off his poker and stolen credit card debts. For the past 2 days he had applied to numerous stores, filling out redundant and demoralizing data, just to be turned down again and again. He was furiously masturbating the anger and despair out, trying to relieve himself through violent orgasm, masking his feelings in the beauty of breasts and long dark hair.
He had promised himself that he would take a week off from his uncontrollable sexuality. He had promised himself not to gamble any more money and not to stay up late. It was a plague that seemed to overwhelm him. His lack of self-control was something new and scary. He had even prayed to God. Being an Atheist, this was quite a defeat, and was not very easy to do. He had asked the Lord to punish him the next time he had failed his promises. Hopefully, he thought, he would scare himself into reality.
The next morning, the sun glared through the cracked blinds onto the bed. The phone, laying on top of the unorganized sheets, rang loud and obnoxiously. Joseph woke up and quickly answered it. Immediately he felt the next day headache of an abnormal sleep schedule. It was a delightful call from an employer who had been impressed with the flawless application of a 16 year old. The interview was scheduled later that day, and in a burst of energy he was groomed, showered, dressed, and ready to attend his first interview of the job hunt.
A lady escorted him to the back of a plain building. They sat down in clashing chairs, looked at one another, and exchanged numerous amounts of questions and answers. Joseph answered to the best of his ability, despite his aching muscles and background headaches that never seemed to leave. It went well however, and he even got a tour of the numerous work stations that were scattered chaotically throughout the building.
For a man who had almost lost all of his self-control, he had finally bagged down a job. Maybe he would finally be asleep at a reasonable time, and maybe he wouldn't even have enough time to play poker or feed his addictions. It was the best time to get back on track, especially since he made a promise to an outside make. He wasn't scared that he would be punished since the idea of a God made him laugh, but he was desperate to help himself.
He met Melyssa the following Monday, and to his delight, found out they would be working together. She was gorgeous and untouchable with long, silky, straight black hair that gently flowed to the side of her brilliant face, extracting the amazing beauty of her emerald green eyes. She was thin and had what appeared to be thousands of outstanding curves that were clearly evident through her classy, but sexy, clothing. She spoke with powerful warmth and confidence, and had shed an aura that was almost overpowering. She smelled of the most delicious fragrances that couldn't begin to be identified.
She had the job of managing clothing and other soft goods along with Joseph. Melyssa stood next to him, grabbing piles of clothes from a black bag, inspecting them, and gently and precisely folding them and adding them to a stack of outgoing clothes. He was lifted by her aura and very nervously did his work, never bringing up a single topic to the girl.
His job wasn't the most exciting. It was a thrift shop that took hundreds of donations each day. Melyssa and Joseph both sorted through the soft goods, filtering out useless items, folding sweaters, and pricing the accepted goods. They had a large carpeted table in the middle of a cozy room that was usually dormant except for the two. The work was easy, but after standing for 6 hours Joseph's legs were starting to ache.
Devoted as ever, he sat down in the tub with the warm droplets falling on his shoulders and masturbated, slowly at first, and picking up in speed as he remembered the traits that Melyssa had poisoned him with. He remembered earlier in the day how Melyssa smelled and how she initially smiled when she first met him. His foreskin was quickly starting to burn, and it was a clear sign that he was too frequently masturbating. But he couldn't stop, and so he spent an hour in the shower, painfully making himself to achieve.
It finally happened, but not without the burn of the sperm seeping into the cracks that he had made. He had failed with his commitment to refrain from masturbating too often. He knew he was obsessive and clearly out of control with his sexuality. He spent that night in his room, either writing music or reading, breaking yet another promise to himself. He was dreadfully tired from his day at work, but he couldn't get to sleep. He had promised that the headaches would go away and that he would make himself on a regular sleep schedule. It didn't happen.
The next day he attended work, Melyssa struck up a conversation while folding clothes.
"So, you needed a job?" she asked gently.
"Yeah, I need the money," he replied bluntly. Melyssa glanced into his eyes until she finally looked back down to the red sweater she was folding.
"It sure is a laidback job, hopefully you will enjoy working here. I'll help you out with anything if you need..." she added.
Joseph thanked her and seemed to disconnect himself from the conversation. It went no further, but it was enough for Joseph to believe that Melyssa could possibly be warming up to him. He took things slowly and never felt optimistic about women, almost hopeless, and he naturally didn't feel completely comfortable around Melyssa yet. They both finished their work in comfortable silence, far from awkward. Joseph felt warm in her presence, and conversation alone could never achieve the same effect.
That night he lay on his back, glancing out between the blinds into the black sky, feeling the ache of overworked muscles. His penis still burned, he was still in debt, and it was well past 3 in the morning. He looked at a random star between the blinds, dropped tears from his eyes, and closed them. Sleep quickly came and overwhelmed his tiny ounce of will to stay awake, and he fell into the deepest sleep he could have imagined.
It was his soul, completely inanimate but seen, that was floating in front of him while he dreamed. The lack of self-control he had tore his soul up. He watched his soul bleed from the innards and drop visceral matter on the floor. He picked up a nameless organ, stared at it, and promised to himself that he will no longer feed his addiction to sexuality. He promised that he would no longer feed his nocturnal behaviors. Finally, he promised that he would pay off all his Poker debts, and quit using unauthorized credit cards. It was an overpowering dark make that was going to keep him in line. The dream consumed him, until he woke up, feeling like a completely new person. He had another chance to change his behavior.
He woke up with a clear memory of his dream. He spent the next 20 minutes lying in his bed, awake, looking at the ceiling. Katie, his sister, entered and handed him the phone.
"Hello," he said groggily.
"Oh, hi!" she said enthused. "This is Melyssa from work, and I made a *huge* mistake. Can you pleeeeeease do me a favor later today??" she asked with hope.
"Umm... sure, what is it?" Joseph said.
"Well... I kind of scheduled a mountain drive with my girlfriends... and I thought I had the day off. I guess I messed up, because I have to work in about two hours. Could you... fill in for me?" she pleaded, her voice raising in pitch.
"Really! That would mean soooo much to me".
"Sure, I'll do it, it's ok".
"Oh, you are so sweet! I'll do anything for you, I swear. Thanks again, and if anybody asks, I'm sick!" she laughed.
Melyssa hung up and apparently went on her mountain drive. Joseph showed up at work and told everybody that Melyssa was sick. He did her job pleasantly, happy to do a favor for such a beautiful girl. He finished his job, punched out, and drove silently home, listening to Debussy.
That night at about 7:30, Melyssa stepped out of her friend's car and into her family's house. She sat on top of her bed with the phone next to her. She took a few deep breathes, laughed, and stretched out the nervousness from her muscles. Melyssa looked through her rich black hair, grabbed for the phone and dialed. She dialed moderately fast, just hoping she could get it over with.
"Hello?" a voice answered.
"Can I talk to Joseph?".
"Yeah sure, one second...". Melyssa waited nervously.
"Hello?" he asked.
"Hi, this is Melyssa. I just wanted to thank you again for earlier today, and I want to take you out to a cafe if you could?" She asked quietly.
"Yes! Let's go!" Joseph responded.
"Okay! I'm *sooooo* excited. Can you pick me up?" she asked, almost giggling.
"Absolutely, just let me know where you live".
Just before it was time to leave, he rummaged through his Mother's drawer, looking for a credit card to buy coffee with. He contemplated the dream he had. He knew he shouldn't take the credit card, but this was a date with the girl of his dreams. He needed the money, and he swore to himself he would never take her credit card again. He grabbed it swiftly and put it in his pocket.
He drove up into Melyssa's driveway, turned his lights off, and headed up the porch. She opened the door before he even knocked, gave him a completely unexpected hug, and off they were. As he drove his legs were shaking of adrenaline. He looked over into her gorgeous eyes and almost melted. He had never felt this warm but nervous at the same time. Melyssa's presence was unfathomably powerful. She was every man's dream.
They both entered the coffee shop and ordered their drinks. They flirted as the drinks were being made and Melyssa was laughing and smiling often. They both received their drinks and sat down in a 2-seat booth, across from each other. Joseph took a sip of his coffee, made an unpleasant face, and looked up at Melyssa.
"What's wrong?" she asked.
"They gave me the wrong coffee... I wanted a cappuccino," he replied.
"Oh well, stay with me and talk".
"Well, I want to exchange this for a cappuccino," he defended.
"Oh, don't be such a baby," she teased.
"I'm not being a baby, I just want to have my cappuccino!" he laughed.
"Yes you are... you are acting like a little baby," she glared. Joseph felt moderately humiliated. "It seems like *all* the cute buys I date act like little babies. I'm surprised I haven't had to bottle feed one yet," she laughed. Joseph's butterflies in his stomach went swirling at a hundred miles an hour.
"You... you consider us dating? Already??" he asked, nervously.
"Well... do you want to... date? I think I like you. It really would be great to get to know you better," she responded.
"That'd be amazing," he said, as he played with her foot from across the table. The night ended on the most positive note Joseph could have thought of. Melyssa apparently liked him and they were now going steady. He was a little confused why Melyssa was so content on calling him a little baby. He thought very little about it, and once again went to bed at 3:00 AM. His punishment would be taken further, and further, until he finally quit with his bad behavior altogether.
He decided to take the initiative and call Melyssa the following day. For the first time in almost a year he had a conversation with a girl on the phone that was over an hour long. It was exciting and relieving to be back in the dating scene. They talked from the silliest of things and laughed, and in another instant they were discussing serious feelings and both seemed to agree with each other's perspective. After the long conversation was finally over, his neck was stiff. It was so stiff that it felt amazingly good and powerful. He remembered the ache well, and finally it had returned to him.
Joseph ended up cashing in on a huge poker pot, winning well over $100. Finally his poker playing had turned around. Melyssa's long black hair was his good luck charm, and when he thought about it specifically, the showdown always turned to his side. Later, he had gambled and lost about $40.00, and feeling emotionally beat, he finally called the poker games off for the evening. He still had made quite a lot of money for a 16-year-old poker player, so his rage was somewhat settling when he looked into his bankroll. It was now time to pay off some of his past debts.
He had a few hours to waste in his house and thought often about his problems. They seemed to be turning around, but of course, he was still indulging in his behavior. He had a job and was finally winning some poker games. Maybe his winnings would stop him from using credit cards. Hopefully, he thought, his dream was purely coincidental. If not, he would surely be punished. Maybe he would become ill. Maybe he would even be caught with stolen credit cards and taken to court for his illegal behavior. Whatever it was, he hoped that nothing bad would happen. It was clear that he had given up on his quest.
His sister Laura, a 17-year-old brunette, was interested in stage plays and often attended shows with her girlfriends, usually eating a dinner during their outing. In an attempt to relate to her little brother, she had given him a free ticket to a show she was seeing so they could watch it together. Despite her intentions for inviting Joseph, her other friends would be attending as well. As the dark skies loomed overhead, they were on a short drive to the dinner theater.
"So... how have you been, Laura?" a cute blond asked her. She was driving comfortably, looking out into the road through the two dice that hung from her rearview mirror. She had a yellow shirt that looked great with her blue pants, which gave her a warm, spring, healthy appearance. Her white bra strap was evident and hanging over her shoulder, as it wasn't perfectly lined up with her shirt strap. She glanced in her rearview mirror it to hear Laura's response.
"Oh, I've been good... a little tired, but good," Laura said.
"Who do we have with you? Is this your baby brother?" she asked with flirty passion. Joseph glanced up and blushed a little bit. He was easily humiliated by women, especially when they babied him or considered him a baby. Luckily, it wasn't often.
"Yeah... I'm her brother," he choked up. He looked to the driver's seat and saw her respond with a smile, as if she knew something he didn't.
"Laura kept saying she was going to bring her baby brother. All of us thought you'd be a little baby in a car seat," she said in a perky tone. "I *lovvvvvve* little babies," she added. Joseph choked out a weak chuckle to acknowledge the blonde's comment.
"Oh, I'm Katie. Jamie's wearing the cat shirt... she likes kitties or something, that is Kristen, and Michelle is sitting right next to you," she said. Joseph looked over at Michelle, and she did the same thing. She made a smile, and he reciprocated.
They arrived at the theater and stood in the back of the dark room, waiting to exchange their tickets. The 4 girls and Joseph finally proceeded to the stage and were looking for tables. They were slightly late and the show was near full. There were only 2 tables left, one suitable for four and one suitable for two. The girls were discussing where they should sit. Joseph didn't add much, still feeling slightly out of place with the new girls. Michelle, with her dark brown hair, glanced through it and looked into my eyes, glanced a smile, and added to the conversation.
"I want to sit with the baby," she said.
"The baby?" Laura questioned.
"Oh... your little brother... "And so it was settled. The three girls sat at the table of four while Michelle and Joseph sat at the table of two.
"How are you?" she said in amazing tonal expression.
"I'm okay... heh," he said, still feeling inferior by her baby comment.
The lights dimmed and it seemed as if the performance was going to begin. Michelle was sitting horizontally across from Joseph, slightly closer to the stage, so he took the opportunity to watch the side of her face. She was so delicate, he thought, so fragile. It seems that if she slips she would break into a million pieces, sparkling like the beauty of a diamond. She was petite and as complex as a gorgeous creature could be. The show was on Michelle, not the performers. He thought of Melyssa but quickly pushed her out of his head.
The show was moderately interesting, but the fantasies of his mind were much more fascinating. He was in a haze of nervousness, excitement, arousal, and embarrassment all because of the "babysitter" that was sitting across from him. Maybe she had some sort of attraction to him. He sat at the table thinking hard about her dressed in leather with her dark hair flowing, gazing into his eyes with the power of a laser, melting his innards with lust and overwhelming beauty.
The presentation was quite long and at the end of Act III the curtains had closed. They would remain closed for a good half an hour while people ate their desserts. It was officially on intermission as the four girls ate delicious cakes and whipped creams. Michelle stood up abruptly.
"Come on... come outside with me!" she pleaded.
"Well... why?" he responded, dumbfounded.
"Let's talk or something... I want to get away from the crowd for a little while," she said in a whining fashion, but undeniably sexy.
"Uhhh... okay, but let me use the bathroom," he stammered, completely panicking at the thought of watching the stars, alone, with her.
"Do you need a diaper?" she giggled. Joseph immediately choked and stood rigid. He was intensely humiliated.
"Oh, I'm sorry... that was stupid, wasn't it? I'm soooo sorry," she pleaded again. "I always take things too far," she complained about herself. "That REALLY wasn't funny, was it? Oh, come out with me anyways," she begged a last time.
He used the bathroom and she escorted him outside to the back of the building. It was late at night and the area was almost completely pitch black. He could see Michelle's facial expressions, but not much more. Being completely nervous around her, he took out a cigarette from his pocket and lit it up, blowing the smoke in the opposite direction from her. Apparently she didn't mind.
Michelle grabbed his hand and influenced him to sit down with his back against the building. She continued to hold his hand. Completely scared, and slightly confused, he looked at her as if to question her.
"Put the cigarette out," she asked.
"Why?" he replied, even more confused.
"I .. uhh... I – I kind of want to ... to – kiss you." she said nervously.
In what seemed like hours, he spent a second contemplating her request. He thought about Melyssa and how he liked her so dear. He remembered that they were going steady and that kissing Michelle would be a terrible, terrible thing to do. It was the hardest decision he had to make. In the end he had no idea why he reacted the way he did, but he gave Michelle a passionate, open-mouth kiss.
The next couple weeks Joseph spent most of his time with Melyssa. He had not seen Michelle since the night of the show. Every time he saw Melyssa his heart fluttered. His legs would still stiffen up and his stomach rolled around in knots whenever he saw her at the beginning of their nights together. She smelled so amazingly sweet that he was madly in love with her scent. They grew amazingly close and the relationship progressed into new levels.
She was sprung out on the couch, laying in Joseph's arms and lap. Joseph cradled her, and she lay in him as if he were a shell. The gorgeous teenage girl was relaxed and content, her arms resting towards her chest. She was dead asleep, breathing slowly and deeply. Joseph had his eyes closed, just enjoying the moment in a relaxed haze. They were alone in her basement. Their couch sat against a middle wall just around the corner from the staircase. They felt secure and isolated.
As Melyssa was dreaming, the unimaginable happened. Joseph's pants slowly darkened with tint as it absorbed moisture. His pants began to flood with warm urine. His boxers stuck to his skin as the urine flooded out, running down his leg and crotch. Melyssa adjusted her position, gaining awareness, and slightly raised her head in confusion. The warm urine had flown to Melyssa's skin as she quickly felt the warmth.
"What's going on?" she asked, confused and stimulated. Joseph was in too much of a daze to respond. He was scared to death as he found out he wet his pants while Melyssa was lying inside of him. Melyssa was still very sleepy and she quickly realized what had happened.
"What the hell is going on?" she said, now angered.
"I... I... don't know," he stammered, about ready to have a heart attack.
"You fucking peed yourself... I absolutely can't believe it," she said, annoyed and disgusted. Joseph turned dark red in embarrassment. The gorgeous teenage girl jumped out of her cradle and glared at Joseph right in the eyes. "Do you have absolutely ANYTHING to say about this?" she stammered. Joseph didn't respond.
"Get up..." she said angrily. He did just that. "Come with me," she whined as she grabbed his hand. She pulled him up the stairs 3/4 of the way before letting him go. She walked up the rest of the way and looked for her parents. The path was clear. "Come on... hurry up!" she whined again.
She led him by the hand, like a toddler who had just peed himself on accident, to her upstairs bedroom. A few bras and some female underwear was scattered on the floor. The presence of a young girl was clearly evident as she brought the urinated boy in.
"I'm ... I'm so sorry Melyssa," he practically cried. It fell on deaf ears as she left the room for a few moments. She came back with a pair of boxers.
"Here... these are my brother's. Just give them back and he'll never know". She tossed the boxers to him. "And put these on... he never uses them," she said as she gave him a pair of black and white pajamas.
"These are pajamas... your parents are going to ask..." Joseph said confidently.
"Yeah, just leave through the window, and I'll drive you home," she said.
"You're going to take me home?" he asked in fear.
"Yeah, this is disgusting. I'm going to take a shower first... you can go do something, anything, I don't care," she said meanly. She was clearly very angry, as expected.
"Melyssa, please wait," he pleaded as she was leaving the room. She stopped at the door, ran her hand through her bangs and pushed them out of her face, and then looked at him. She saw a boy who had peed his pants like a toddler, or better yet, a baby. She was nervous and clearly very stressed out.
"I have no idea what happened, I swear," he said, tears welding in his eyes. He felt like he was losing her for good. Melyssa paused.
"Jesus... do you know what you just DID?!?!?!" she asked, amazed.
"I know, I'm so scared Melyssa. I have no idea what happened," he said, finally breaking into tears. He sniffled and wiped his eyes as his cheeks became wet. Melyssa noticed his gleaming cheeks. She shut the door and walked towards her bed, right where Joseph was standing. She sat down and clutched his hand. She gently squeezed it to show that she still had feelings for him.
"Alright... just relax, but I really need to get out of these clothes," she said sweetly. She left the room and Joseph proceeded to dry himself off. He took his clothes off and dried off with a towel. He put the foreign boxers on, feeling very strange.
Joseph lay down on her soft bed while she showered off the piss on her skin. He was trying to calm himself down from the rush that had just overwhelmed him. As he put his head down on her pillow he smelled the sweet remains of her soaps and lotions that she often used on her face. It was so delicious it made him sick.
She came out of the shower dressed with her hair pulled up to keep it from getting wet. She took her clip out and let her beautiful black hair fall down. Joseph gazed at her in pure astonishment. It was a bittersweet feeling as he remembered his urination accident earlier. He showered as Melyssa cleaned up the couch and pillows. Once she was finished, she waited in her room for Joseph to come out. As he exited the steamy bathroom, Melyssa's mother saw him.
"Why did you use the shower?" Nancy asked, confused.
"Oh... I spilled a whole can of soda on myself," he blushed.
"Oh no! Do you need some clothes or anything?" she offered.
"Melyssa's got it covered, but thanks… and sorry," he apologized.
He entered Melyssa's room and saw her lying on her stomach with her hand on her chin. He walked around the bed and sat in a chair right next to it. Melyssa looked at him with her large green eyes and said nothing. She continued looking at him, as if studying him.
"What?" Joseph asked.
"No really, what are you thinking?"
"Well, I'm still pretty upset," she said. Her green eyes moved down to the sheets on her bed as she spoke. "I don't really know what to say, that was pretty terrible".
"I know, but I had no control, it just kind of happened," he responded.
"That's what scares me. How do I know it won't happen again?" Melyssa said sadly. Joseph looked down and knew he had no answer. A short silence took place before Melyssa added to the conversation.
"I think we're going to have to take a break," she continued, "until we can figure something out". Joseph's eyes spoke sadly as his tears grew in the corners of his eyes.
"Alright, Melyssa, I'm really sorry."
"I know you are... you can still call me though. I just don't want to get so close."
"But I really, really like you," he whimpered. Melyssa said absolutely nothing. "I can't believe I fucking ruined it again," he yelled.
"Please, calm down," Melyssa pleaded.
"NO. I always ruin it with girls. I knew I'd fuck it up. I'm sorry Melyssa, but you can't expect much more from somebody like myself," he grouched.
"No, you are a great person," Melyssa said, stressed out and on the verge of tears. A stream of tears ran down Joseph's face.
"I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry," he cried. "I'll call you, I promise. Please, just let me still talk to you," he irrationally begged.
"I will answer, I promise," she said. And with that Joseph gave her an enormous hug, looked in her eyes one last time, and left her room. He drove home in his black pajamas and cried. He had no idea why the events had happened. He decided not to call his love until he had an idea that would get his trust back with Melyssa. He thought that she saw him as a dog who simply couldn't be house trained.
It was late in the morning as Joseph woke up from his sleep. He sat up from under his covers, pulled up the blinds, and looked out his window to see nothing but dark, gray clouds and raindrops dripping down the outside of the glass. He opened his window to hear the beautiful rain dropping on the ground. He thought of Melyssa and felt the rain was symbolic of his tears.
He put on a pair of dark blue pajama bottoms and proceeded into the living room. The house was desolate with his parents being at work and Laura nowhere to be found. The room was filled with smoky light as the uncomfortable aura of the storm diffused through the windows. He walked with his head down to the large, glass sliding door that led into the backyard. He slid the door open and walked out into the rain.
Feeling the cold drops fall onto his naked back, his memory was instantly poisoned. He remembered sitting in the luscious green yard with Melyssa. Her green eyes blended in beautifully with the surroundings. The trees were flowing with young and healthy leaves and the dark shades from the branches created cracks in the stone-path walkway.
But now the yard was filled with smoky grains of light with a sense of despair in the air. The cement bench, which once held the slim female, was desolate and wet, leaking raindrops from the ledges. The memories were gone and seemed they would be gone forever. It was astonishingly painful as he sat against the house and cried.
The next week he had not even called Melyssa. He was determined to make it up to his love before talking to her again. He spent everyday thinking of all the fun times they once had together. His stomach ached with butterflies as he remembered specific details and conversations with her. Sometimes he remembered the sweet way she smelled and felt like throwing up.
He ended up quitting his job only 4 days after the urination incident. He felt the job wasn't very important to him since he had collected a couple of credit cards from carbon receipt copies when he rang up customers. He decided to make quick, unauthorized purchases from library computers. He was clearly angry with himself and the world, falling downward and downward without Melyssa.
The world was going nowhere for Joseph, and so he dedicated many hours thinking and worrying about his bladder control. He knew that he would make any sacrifice in the world if it meant he could touch Melyssa's soft skin again. He spent night after night dreaming about her as soon as he finally fell asleep in the wee-hours of the morning. And then, out of nowhere, an idea struck. He knew he had to do something extreme to get his girl back. It was absurd and bizarre, but it was an idea.
Nervously, he walked through the aisles of the grocery store with a hand basket. It was 9:30 PM and the store was very clear of customers. He breathed hard and tried to actually contemplate what he was going to do for a girl. He wanted to roll up and die with embarrassment as he neared the personal health isle. He turned into the isle and walked stiffly to the adult brief department.
He stopped in front of a wide selection of disposable adult briefs. His eyes were glazed in fear as he knew what had to be done. He quickly searched the shelves for a size adequate for his waist. The first pack of briefs that contained the medium sizing was taken and put into the basket. His heart throbbed and his adrenaline pumped as he was doing the unordinary. He walked quickly to the self-checkout and bagged his briefs. In an instant he was out of the store.
He drove home with the package in the passenger's seat and snuck it through his window into his room. He spent the next 10 minutes in his room analyzing the objects that he planned on wearing. He noticed the amazing similarities to a baby diaper as he pulled the first one out of the package. He unfolded it and noticed the bulky protection of the diaper. He felt strange, sick, and just plain idiotic, but he took off his pants and boxers to put it on.
He stood in front of the mirror and watched in self-pity as he diapered himself. He put the diaper between his legs, pulled it up, and continued to strap it around his waist. It was awkward because he had never worked with a diaper before. He felt an amazing sense of self defeat, but quickly reminded himself that his desperate attempt at making Melyssa feel more comfortable would work perfectly.
He redressed and grabbed a phone to proceed to call Melyssa. Wearing a diaper, he dialed her number.
"Hello?" a girl's voice asked in a low, unmotivated pitch.
"Hi. Can I talk to Melyssa?"
"Joseph???" she choked.
"I've really missed you," she said depressingly.
"I've missed you, too"
"You were supposed to call me," she whined.
"I know, I had to figure some things out," he replied. "Are you sick? Your voice sounds different."
"Ohhhhhh... no. I'm just really lonely," she said, her voice shaky and fragile.
"I'm really sorry," he said once more.
"Oh, it's ok, I'm just glad you called," she said. Secretly, Melyssa was crying, as her green eyes rained droplets.
"Melyssa, I've been thinking, and –" he stopped.
"What is it?"
"Do you mind if we take a drive together?" he questioned. "I mean if you are still mad at –".
"I think we should," she sputtered.
The storm had moderately blown over and was on recess, only sprinkling lightly. He drove to the secluded land where her house stood and pulled into her wet driveway. He looked at the front door through the windshield wipers and tiny droplets. Melyssa had been waiting for him and skipped through the rain to his car. She entered the car and immediately filled it with amazing scent.
"Hey Joseph," she said happily, yet awkwardly.
"Hey," he replied.
They drove far away into the mountains. Joseph finally turned off from the dark mountain road onto a large dirt pull off and scenic stop. He took a tiny dirt road into a small canyon that held a dark, moving river. He continued driving off into complete seclusion. They were sheltered through the large trees and away from humanity by the large, crowded canyon wall. He pulled into the furthest dirt path and parked in a small square that was about 15 feet from the river's bank.
Melyssa was intrigued by the mysterious and gothic location. The early evening was strangely dark because of the stormy gray clouds that loomed overhead. Tiny droplets gathered on the windshield as he opened his door and got out with Melyssa. He took her by the hand to the bank of the river and sat on a stone. They could see the water moving and the drops of water scratching the surface of the river. Melyssa felt abnormally comfortable in such an uneasy setting.
"I come here a lot," Joseph said.
"Since we last saw each other". Melyssa grew quiet again. "Have you been doing ok?" he asked sensitively.
"Yeah, I guess so, but I feel dead inside"
"Me too," he replied. Melyssa just continued to look at the running water.
"Which river is this?" she asked
"I'm not sure"
"Oh," she said, sounding disappointed.
"It can be our river," he offered. She didn't respond. "I have something to tell you, Melyssa," he said weakly. His heart was out of control and his stomach churned in circles. If it wouldn't have been so cool out, his face would've flushed.
"What is it?" she asked curiously.
He sat there as he gathered the courage to tell her. He suddenly felt insecure about his decision and ultimately pessimistic.
"Joseph?" she questioned.
"Just look," he responded as he looked down to his pants.
He slowly unbuttoned his pants in front of her. Melyssa grabbed his hand and stopped him.
"No, don't do this. I don't know what you are thinking but just take me home, please," she said meanly.
"No, just look," he said as he unzipped his pants and exposed his bulky crotch to her. Melyssa took a second to process the significance of his crotch. She clearly noticed his undergarment and slowly raised her chin up to his eye level in a questioning facial expression.
"You're wearing a diaper??" she asked curiously.
"I know, it's embarrassing."
"What made you put a diaper on?" she questioned in her accustomed, beautiful voice.
"It's just... this way, you can... you know, trust me," he mumbled out. Melyssa touched his diaper with her index finger. Her fingernail was polished baby blue. She looked across the riverbanks and exhaled a confused laugh.
"You're really funny," she said, feeling relaxed. "I think it's kind of sweet. But I don't know what my friends would think if they knew I dated a boy in diapers," she smiled.
"Ohhhhh, you better not," he said.
"Oh, don't worry about it," she said back. "You know, I think this is a good idea even though it is bizarre."
"Me too. I feel pretty stupid," Joseph laughed.
"You shouldn't feel stupid."
"Because you act like a baby anyways," she giggled. "I'm just joking, of course," she redeemed.
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